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A
re You A Psychopathic Killer?


Are you a sane, productive member of society, or a frothing madman who deserves to be locked up in a room for the rest of your natural life? Well, now you can find out (so as better to hide the fact) with this new and helpful quiz.

1. You are invited to share a locker with a person in your homeroom. You dislike that person, but you need a locker. Do you:

a) Accept the offer and avoid your partner.
b) Decline the offer.
c) Pull out a knife and continually drive it into your partner's gut and skull laughing madly as they scream.

2. A store clerk comes up to you and says "May I help you?" You reply:

a) "Yes, you may. Thank you."
b) "Oh, fuck off, you little prick."
c) By planting an axe in their forehead.

3. You have some paper and sealing wax. Do you:

a) Make a paper boat.
b) Throw them away.
c) Kill someone.

4. What do you think of Bran Flakes?

a) They're OK.
b) Well, I had them once at a friend's house, but that was because they didn't have any Froot Loops, so I was sorta forced to eat them, but otherwise, ya.
c) Bran whats?

5. Your favourite food is:

a) Bread.
b) Bread.
c) Bread.

Scoring:

0-3 - You are hopelessly normal. Just another faceless member of a massive society, undistinguishable from any other pleb who walks this decrepit and uniform earth.
3.14 - 4 - You are not quite lunatic caliber, but keep trying!
17 or above - Congratulations! You are a full-fledged psycho! Send in this coupon for a free knife.


Backup Stop Onwards


If you like anything here, or if you don't, please e-mail milky@yip.org. It just makes sense.