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The Charred Molasses Fields
by Milky

The two lambs grazed slowly, savouring each morsel of grass. They wandered past the large dent the meteor had left down to the basin of the large river which they knew as 'Kyfari'.

"I hate you," one of the lambs said to the other one. Which is obvious, seeing as lambs don't talk to themselves. But then, lambs don't talk at all. So that was actually a fairly useful disclaimer. Not that I disclaimed anything. I am willing to bear all the credit or all the blame for anything that happens between these two lambs. I owe them that much.

The other lamb looked up at the other lamb. That is, the lamb which had recently been told that it was hated by the first lamb. Which actually wasn't the first lamb, there had been many before. Thousands. Millions, maybe. But it was the first lamb mentioned. Well, the first SPECIFICALLY pointed out. Y'know, the part where she said "I hate you". I think I just revealed that the first lamb (in the story) is actually a female. I hope that doesn't give away the later surprise that the first lamb is actually the mother of the second lamb. How fitting. In chronological order of existance, the first lamb really is first.

So anyhow, the daughter lamb looked up at the mother lamb. You'll notice they are both female lambs. That's not because I'm sexist. It would have totally spoiled the plot if one or both or all of them had've been male. Try to imagine males in the situation that these two lambs are in. I'm not racist either. Lambs were just well suited for the lead characters, as it is essentially a lamb-based story. Lamb-based. That sounds a little like land-based. I don't really know what land-based refers to though. Something military, I'd wager. What isn't military nowadays.

The daughter lamb looked up at the mother lamb. She licked her lips. It was grass, you see. I mentioned earlier how they were eating grass. It wasn't a sexual advance. Actually, maybe it was. I'll let the reader decide.

So the daughter lamb and the mother lamb had sex. Oh, I hope I didn't give it away. Wait, actually, I'm narrating so I'm supposed to tell the plot. And develop characters. I'd develop the characters of the lambs more, but they are really simple two-dimensional characters. I mean, they eat grass, walk around and have incestuous sex. There isn't too much you can add to those sort of characters. Maybe I will just get to the climax and then the story will end. That would be quite nice.

"Ooo", moaned the daughter lamb. That was the climax. Pretty good, eh? Well, trust me. The daughter lamb really enjoyed it. The mother lamb did too. So did a nearby horizontal line. But that is another story. Actually, it isn't. But someday, it will be. I'm no liar. Maybe I'll go for another climax. Involve the river and connect it to the first paragraph.

The daughter lamb pushed the mother lamb into the river. Excellent. Sex and action. With lambs, even. This really is the perfect story. I have three lines in which to end it. Er. The mother floated downstream. The daughter later organized pro-croquet rallies outside the Cyprussian consulate in Cyprus. Do countries have consulates in themselves? Anyhow, end.

Backup Stop Onwards


If you like anything here, or if you don't, please e-mail milky@yip.org. Failure to do so may cause your bones to liquify and your eyeballs to explode.