Yapo: Ow. Ferocious canker sore, why do you pester me so? Do you not understand the meaning of pain? Do you not realize that you are doomed to nonexistance, if I simply keep my hands away from my mouth? Are you so foolish as to be blind to the pitiful nature of your existence?
Canker sore: Oh Yapo, you don't understand. Even if I didn't want to exist this glamourous life as a reddish sore on your tongue, I'd have no choice in the matter. Sores have no vote, and no control over their own destinies. Though your argument is certainly most convincing, I simply can't leave your tongue's moist pastures until the germs which created me have fled.
Yapo: Canker sore, canker sore, canker sore. I apologize so profusely there's bile in my mouth. Though certainly you are painful and annoying, you have rights, and it is not for me to decide where you should exist. Please, continue to inhabit my tongue, until you run out of germs and are forced to leave.
Canker sore: Leave! (sighs deeply) How I wish I was simply leaving. You see, when I flee your mouth, I do not "leave", I die. I cease to exist and never trouble anyone's mouth again. It is a fearsome tragedy, replayed many hundreds of times in many hundreds of mouths day after day after day.
Yapo (near tears): Oh cank, why is your species doomed to such a pitiful existence? You live only to make people miserable for a few days and then are cruelly slaughtered, living only to be resented.
Canker sore: I blame God, naturally. I think he thought that maybe if people got the occasional canker sore, they'd be grateful when it left.
Yapo: HEARTLESS BASTARDS! Cank, my little cank-like sore, I long to cradle and comfort you. I understand your pain and your futility and it wounds me. Ow. You really do hurt when I talk a lot. But I forgive you! If there is anything I can do to make what remains of your life more enjoyable, please don't hesitate to ask.
Canker sore: Some company would be very nice. If you wouldn't mind just never washing your hands and touching lots of handrails and toilet seats and the like and then licking off your hands, I would be filled with copious amounts of gratitude. As long as there are new canker sores to carry on my memory and my legend, then a part of me will always live.
Yapo: Yes, that's what they always say on TV when someone dies. I suppose you're right. You've got a deal! (they shake). END.